Thursday Thirteen

It’s been a while since I’ve done the Thursday Thirteen. With such a stooshy brewing up about the X Factor version of ‘Hallelujah’ and the campaign to bring Jeff Buckley’s classic version to number one instead, I’ve decided to do my thirteen favourite vocalists today. That’s favourite – not necessarily the vocalists who I think are the best singers.

Either way, you’ll not be surprised to learn that Alexandra from the X Factor isn’t amongst them. You’ll also not be surprised to find there is a certain hard rock edge to the list.

In no particular order:-

1. Jeff Buckley. As Bob Doolally would say “sadly dead now”. Although ‘Hallelujah’ was written by Leonard Cohen and has been performed by just about every singer in the world, there is only one definitive version and that is Jeff Buckley. I first heard his ‘Grace’ album when working in a bar in Edinburgh. The punters used to stick on ‘Hallelujah’ 9 times out of 10 and from that point on I was hooked. ‘Grace’ is an album that everyone should own.
2. Freddie Mercury. Bob is busy today with the “sadly dead now” proclamation. Simply one of the finest vocalists ever to live. The naive, teenaged me somehow failed to notice that he was as gay as Christmas. Big tache. Tight fitting clothes. Camp strutting. It was the same with Rob Halford from Judas Priest. I just thought the leather chaps, studs and leather cap were ‘Heavy Metal’. Makes no difference to me – just a comment on my observation skills.
3. Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden). The Air Raid Siren. What a voice. Scream for me bloggers. Got a bit ropey around the ‘No Prayer For The Dying’ and ‘Fear of The Dark’ albums where he had a tendency to growl more than sing in places but restored to his full vocal brilliance upon the reformation of the classic Maiden lineup. His solo work is brilliant as well. His cover version of ‘All the Young Dudes’ should have been naff but was instead excellent.
4. Steve Hogarth (Marillion). Very few vocalists have the vocal range and emotion in their voice to move an audience to tears. I’ve seen a guy standing next to me crying his eyes out to ‘Estonia’. Often unfairly considered the ‘new singer’ in Marillion (after the departure of Fish in 1988, Hogarth has been in the band for 20 years now compared to Mr Dick’s 7 year tenure at the helm. Marillion is Hogarth’s band now and they would never have flown so high and written such beautiful music if Fish had remained.
5. James La Brie (Dream Theater). An amazing vocalist with a brilliant range. Was offered the Iron Maiden job after Bruce Dickinson left in the early 90′s. I think it’s safe to say that had LaBrie had become Maiden vocalist instead of the dire Blaze Bayley, we may not have seen a return to the classic line-up.
6. Bob Dylan. His songs always sound better when someone else sings them and he sounds like a hoarse hyena when he sings. Somehow though it’s totally distinctive. One of the greats although I’m not entirely sure I get the whole film thing where loads of different people play him (including a female actress). Nothing to do with the music though.
7. Doro Pesch (Warlock). Bloody awful singer with poor pronunciation of English words with the strongest German accent since Klaus Meine. Maybe she’s in this list because I used to fancy her when I was a teenager. I don’t really know. Either way, songs like ‘Fur Immer’ and ‘East meets West’ evoke memories of a certain time for me so Doro is on the list.
8. Klaus Meine (Scorpions). For all the same reasons as Doro except I didn’t fancy him. As he gets older I’m finding it more difficult to physically tell him apart from Ronnie James Dio. It’s the balding perm and diminutive stature that does it.
9. The bird that sang the Cadbury’s flake advert in the 1980′s. ‘Only the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate….’. Enough said.
10. Ozzy Osbourne. Another bloody awful vocalist who somehow still sounds good. I always find myself wondering how come Ozzy can sing clear as a bell but for some reason sounds like he’s had half a dozen strokes when he is speaking.
11. Ronnie James Dio. I actually prefer the Dio era Black Sabbath material to the Ozzy era stuff. Much more my style. Tracks such as ‘Mob Rules’ and ‘Heaven and Hell’ are classics. Looks like Rumpelstiltskin.
12. Oliver Hardy. I love all of the musical moments from the old L&H movies. Hardy had a great voice. ‘Shine on Harvest Moon’ and ‘On the Trail of the Lonesome Pine’. Excellent stuff. See how musically broad-minded I am…….
13. Mike Patton (Faith No More). ‘The Real Thing’ is still one of my favourite albums of all time. Cracking falsetto voice. Of course, he then proceeded to spoil his good work by grunting his way through the next God knows how many albums like a Donkey doing a particularly difficult shit. Redeemed himself on ‘Album of The Year’ though in a true return to form.

So there we have my a selection of my favourite singers. I wonder how many of them have sang ‘Hallelujah’?

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