Amazing but true. A man was attacked last week in an unprovoked assault in an East Dunbartonshire street. Police are looking for (and I kid you not) a “Mummy”. Not someone’s ma. They are looking for some fucker wrapped up in bandages. My facebook page has been falling down with photos of pissed up adults [...]
Posts under ‘Rants’
The Napolina tomato sliding scale of financial destruction
So, here we are. On the edge of the abyss apparently. I’ve never been so glad to get back to work on a Monday. The weekends are just full of miserable suit and tie guys on the telly, predicting the end of the world as we know it. The Sunday Times had about a 10 [...]
The Tyne Tunnel is a prick
I had to drive to Peterlee yesterday. That’s Peterlee, not Peters and Lee. That’s something completely different. I set off at 5.30am. Not a nice time of the morning to be driving. You need the windows full open to prevent you dropping back into slumber. Anthrax was pumping out of the CD player and the [...]
I walked to work and all I got was this lousy teacake
I walked to work today. I’m sick of sitting on buses in Scotland’s car park capital, so despite the rain, I decided to walk to work. About a quarter of the way up Leith Walk, my attention was drawn to a gaggle of workies crowding round 3 young girls carrying cardboard boxes. It turned out [...]
Just say no. To trams.
This morning I snapped. Not exactly like Michael Douglas in ‘Falling Down’ but let’s just say I was more than annoyed. After months and months of tram related inconvenience, I finally felt the urge to bawl one of the flourescent jacketed pricks right out of it. I am working from home today. I like working [...]
Sardines
What is it about bus drivers (and I am well aware that Blakey was a bus inspector) which make them so miserable? I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been running for a bus and I know that the bastard can see me in his wing mirror and yet he still pulls away [...]
Yer pants belong inside yer troosers
What’s with the current trend for guys to wear their jeans half way down their arses, with their boxers pulled up to their armpits and protruding above the waistband of their jeans. Your underwear belongs inside your trousers. That is an undisputable fact. Unless you are superman. Let’s be honest, I don’t want to see [...]
Spongebob’s Progress/Mikey for teh win
Thought it was about time I posted an update on Sam or ‘Spongebob’ as we often refer to him. He’s coming along great. He’s ten and a half months old now and has started to take his first faltering steps. His walking style is reminiscent of me when I’ve had a few pints to be [...]
Noah’s Ark
Ok. I’m sick of rain. It’s getting biblical at this stage. It’s not stopped raining for any length of time for what seems like the last week. Add to that the fact that the second week of our summer holiday was predominantly rainy and you can see why I’m starting to feel like the Ancient [...]
